Most of us have a sig­nif­i­cant friend, rel­a­tive, per­son or peo­ple in our lives that have expe­ri­enced much suf­fer­ing, grief and loss.  How can we main­tain the heal­ing hope and human strength for those and our­selves with­out enabling, becom­ing ill or stop caring?

In The Book of Secrets, by Deepak Chopra (Three Rivers Press, 2004) a heal­ing rela­tion­ship is based on aware­nesses. Both part­ners work to break old habits that pro­mote suf­fer­ing. We have to walk a fine line, because com­pas­sion means that we appre­ci­ate the suf­fer­ing some­one else is expe­ri­enc­ing, as well as your own. Yet at the same time there has to be detach­ment, mak­ing sure that suf­fer­ing, no mat­ter how real, isn’t the dom­i­nant reality.

The atti­tudes that make for a heal­ing rela­tion­ship become part of a vision you hold for your­self and the other person.

For instance: ‘I won’t let you go through this alone. or ‘I am not going to leave you.”  These state­ments may cause bur­den and/or ill­ness for all the indi­vid­u­als involved. We can how­ever, become mind­ful, cam­pas­sion­ate and truly inter­ested and engaged with their suf­fer­ing, yet, we need to know our heal­ing bound­aries and lim­i­ta­tions in order for this heal­ing real­tion­ship to be truly ongo­ing and healthy.

A heal­ing rela­tion­ship main­tains proper bal­ance with self and others.

How is your heal­ing and how healthy are your relationships?